Life is so astonishing.
There are moments when things seem so dark to me...yet within the hour I reflect on that intense dark madness with wonder at where it came from...last night, home with my dog friends, I had such moments...

This morning I found a poem by Rumi that expresses it so well:

SOMETIMES
I FORGET COMPLETELY
WHAT COMPANIONSHIP IS.
Unconscious and insane
I spill sad energy everywhere.
My story gets told in various ways:
a romance, a dirty joke,
a war, a vacancy.
Divide up my
forgetfulness
by any number,
it will go around.

These dark suggestions
that I follow,
are they part of some plan?

Friends,
be careful.
Don't
come near me
out of curiosity
or sympathy.

A BLACK SKY
HATES
THE MOON.
I am that dark
nothing. I hate those
in power.
I'm invited in from the
road to the house
but I invent some excuse.
Now I'm angry
at the road.
I don't need love.  Let
someone break me.
I don't want
to hear anyone's trouble.
I've had my chance
for wealth and position.
I don't want those.
I am iron resisting
the most enormous magnet
there is.

-Rumi

Do yourself a favor today and buy the book called The Illuminated Rumi.  Translations by Coleman Barks and illustrations by Michael Green.  Food for the Soul.